I can understand losing the weight for basic health reasons but it won't help the problem, the constant pain and quality of life won't get better until a Dr. agress to help you and get the surgery. They don't live in your shoes to know how difficult it is.

I decided not to have weight loss surgery after a botched attempt in December left me with a distrust of that doctor. I have gone from 283 to 209 without surgery. I will lose another 60 pounds on my own and then get my hip replacements surgery and hernia repair too this summer.
I am gonna do it without weight loss surgery. Once I can walk without a walker, I will continue to get in shape by walking every day.

Prayers
I had my right hip replaced in may 2017 best thing I did for myself I was in severe pain couldn't hardly walk or sit or stand to long the pain was unbearable the orthopedic surgeon I had was awesome he wanted me to loose weight i did loose some but not what he wanted me to but he went ahead and took a chance on me and did the surgery after I got healed I joined a gym and changed my way of eating my primary doctor suggested I do healthy lifestyle way of eating and moving
Its best to loose the weight because there's so many complications with this surgery I had several complications when I had my surgery
Try doing some research on it

Hi Anne. I am sorry, I have no doctor referrals for you as I live here in San Diego , CA. But sending you best wishes . We are close to same age. I am 75yrs old. I reached my goal weight of 150lbs down from my highest weight of 216lbs. But now still here struggling terribly to keep it off. I am 5'5" tall. Hope you can get relief for your hip pain soon. Perhaps instead of trying to find a doctor that would do the surgery..may not be a good idea. As most likely healing well would be a big factor with the excess weight. Might be wiser to try finding a person that specializes in nutrition and weight loss to help you with that. Getting the weight off allowing you then to have the surgery, would be so much better and healthier for you. Take care.

You can do it
You have lots of support here as well